I'm Trying
by Crashrox92
Summary: Having one of those days when your crippling depression actually lets you have a feeling? Instead of staring at your bedroom ceiling, hollow, empty? Then your android ruins it by not getting the hints? Both are as clueless and stubborn as the other in their own right & are somehow both detectives, Social Lesson 1, how NOT to ask a friend to hangout, with our hosts, Hank and Connor.


**A/N Yo, been a while since I've uploaded anything on here, but straight to the point...I got dragged super hard into this fandom, I don't know what happened, I'm not a fan of quantic dream games, but this one. sure its got flaws but overall its a fun game and I love the hell out of the Connor and Hank parts and am offering sacrificial shower scenes to the shit god known as the Cage for some form of DLC, even an animated Netflix series or something get on their case people! :)**

 **Anyway, I searched the heck out of fanart and one picture in particular put this idea in my head and now I have to get it out before it drives me nuts :P so here we go...its been a while and I'm not the best of writers so please be gentle with my sensitive heart :P P.S This is just a friendship flick nothing more :)  
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* * *

 **I'm Trying**

Hank walked promptly down a hallway, looking mostly at the ground or letting his eyes glaze over whenever he had to look where he was going in front of him, mainly to avoid human contact of course. It had been a while since he had been out anywhere besides bars, work or his house...or a gutter. In fact he thought about in more detail and realized...how the fuck did he even decide to go here? oh that's right it all started when he briefly mentioned the idea to Connor, and him somehow convincing him to go.

There was some misunderstanding along the way since he wasn't planning on going...alone. Now to avoid looking like an idiot, he went anyway.

* * *

 **An hour before.**

"Humans are social creatures after-all." Connor encouraged.

Hank stood at the edge of his kitchen, he combed his fingers through his hair making an awkward hissing sound through his teeth, "Y-eah, I guess...been a while since I was a social butterfly mind." he then looked to his TV, "What do you do all day when I'm not here?"

Connor looked at him thoughtfully. "Just, menial tasks...sometimes I try to improve the quality of your home. Take Sumo out, those kind of things."

"Huh. that explains why my books have been alphabetized...unnecessarily but 'kay. don't you get bored shit-less or anything?"

Connor doubtfully shook his head, "Not really. I've not been staying here with you that long Hank. no need for concern. after all, it was you who advised me to lay low for a while, until the situation in the city settled."

Hank started to get ready to go out, more like dragging himself as he looked around for certain items in a daze. "I know what I said ya little diu nei."

Connor spun around on the couch raising a high brow at him, "So, instead of insulting me in your usual tongue you decide to do it in another?" he mused.

Hank dusted his jacket as a casual gesture, "Well, y'know sometimes you just have to make an effort." he jested. "Connor? do you still have your beanie?"

Connor furrowed his brow to the too obvious of a question, "Of course Lieutenant. It hides my LED to avoid unnecessary conflict? if need be."

Yeah he knew. Hank was dragging conversation out at this point as he seemed to be working himself up, clapping and rubbing his hands together as he eyed up his car out the front window. "Y'know, its a big deal tonight...'specially how I've placed a huge wad on a bet." he said in Connors direction but spoke to the window.

"So you've mentioned Hank, 36 times actually." Connor friendly replied. "except the gambling part...that's new." he added disapprovingly.

Hank rubbed his sleeves showing his anxiousness, "Surprisingly, not many of them are interested in the sport down at the station...well that's half true the other half was my dramatic change in personality over the years... _in short an asshole_." he started to say, reaching a hand into his jacket pocket, "but y'know otherwise I would've-"

"Hank." Connor started calmly. "You're rambling, just go already." he teased.

Hanks expression couldn't change so fast, Connor took a gamble on his social practices in teasing him and couldn't fail more hard, " **Rambling**? just go? Oh I'll go alright, don't worry!" he yanked a scarf from the coat rack and threw it around him that it whacked him in the face. "You get the whole fucking place yourself!" he slid a hand through Sumo's fur as he stead fast towards the door, "I hope Sumo **shits** on your tie!" he slammed the door but spontaneously opened it again, "I forgot my **shoes**!" he hollered with snow on his socks.

 **slam!**

The door opened again as Hank started spearing a pointed finger at Connor. "Remember to lock the fucking doors! This is a not a _nice_ area! And if the doorbell goes, don't answer, they're probably selling something and I don't want you talking to strangers who will take advantage of your clustered **fuck** of a curious nature!" he yelled with good intentions?

 **slam!**

Connor and Sumo stared at the door waiting with baited breath to see if Hank came back for a a third time, "I suppose the Lieutenant was in no mood for being teased, I never realized how serious of a sport this is." he pondered as Sumo uttered a sad whine. "Still..." he then stood up and starting eyeing up the house. "I'd like to add, that I apologize on Hanks behalf for even suggesting that you would defecate on any part of my formal attire Sumo." he gently patted the St. Bernard on the head. "You're a good boy after all."

Outside as Hank got into his car he put his hand back into his pockets and pulled out two tickets and flung them onto the dashboard, "Ah fuckit, literal bastard couldn't catch a hint even if I spelt it in binary code...and I'm not even sure if that's the right fucking terminology!" he growled yanking the gear stick and grinding it into reverse, his poor car squealing as it backed out of the drive/front lawn.

* * *

Christ why was he here? How did he develop this sudden motivation? he's so easily told his own mind to fuck off many times before, from working to actually taking care of himself. How is this any different? Maybe the motivation came from the fact that this was his own idea in the first place, or maybe that once upon a time this would be a regular hangout, a tradition, a...well he thought maybe, since Connor is deviant now he'd show him the ropes of what it meant to be alive...he looked so god damn lost and confused.

An android portrayed as an adult in his 20's but his deviancy made him lose his sense of direction and a set purpose, he looked more like a young adolescent unsure of what to do with his life...so he had to help him out right? "This was a stupid fucking idea." he thought receiving a number of light shoulder checks as he moved through people. he's not enjoyed being out in a long time let alone being in the presence of huge crowds of humans, the nosy journalist were bad enough with the homicide cases but this was worse. he kinda wished for the company of a murdered corpse at least they didn't spout bullshit, or act as sickeningly happy as a Mormon.

At this point he was trying to convince himself to just turn back, but then again he loved basketball, his current mind set made him lack the proper passion but he still loved it and why the hell not...but then again he did look like the poster child of a captioned sadness poster. or meme..mentioning that on top of his crippling self doubt reminded him of his age. "shit..." he cursed.

Turning back however was not an option now, it was too much effort at this point to walk then to just sit down, he took a few steps down He stopped at his row and got an idea how far in his seat was, looking down however had possibly changed his mind all together about seeing this game. although he couldn't avoid the inevitable, it still hurt nonetheless as he spotted a man and small boy perched on the end of the row, cheering before the game had even begun. The father explaining to his son whom obviously was a new fan to this; was explaining the rules, the positions and passing on his on personal opinions onto him. but Hank could tell it was just being in one anothers company that most of their laughter came from. speaking nonsense and making plans.

God how he missed that feeling, instead whenever he tried thinking about those moments, they turned to a strained feeling in his heart and a twisted stomach.

he sighed, taking a small awkward step back, "Why'd I even come here?" he questioned himself again, cursing under his breath and without looking more of a fool than he felt at that moment he turned swiftly with his mind set on just finding the exit.

"Hello Lieutenant."

" **JesusFUCKINGchrist!** "

Nearly falling down a flight of stairs due to the sudden appearance of Connor (whose face was mere inches away from Hanks) and nearly falling into cardiac arrest, Hank gripped his chest tightly as he took deep breaths.

Connor took this as a cue to speak first before his partner could have a chance to. "Forgive my intrusion Lieutenant. But I...you see."

Hank was still in a dazed like confusion, not even able to raise his eyes off his chest to see if he was alive.

"Let me explain. all day today you expressed your fondness of this sport, and subconsciously or not I don't think you were aware of the subtly in some of your words...I may be wrong but my analysis of your raised heart rate and sweat glands says otherwise. As well as your sudden outburst earlier today."

Hank exhaled a long deep breath out, signaling that he has finally finished dying and took in his surroundings he pinched the bridge of his nose "Connor...I haven't the slightest idea about the shit that's spewing out your mouth right now but that last bit...what have I told you about analyzing my...my fucking body!" he blurted, snapping his head to the ground and trying to justify himself to...well nobody. "I meant to say my biology...anatomy? fucking chemistry I don't fucking know, analyzing me! Just stop. Another thing who the shitting hell of asshats gets **that** close to someones face! I nearly pissed my pants you shitlicker! _now everyone's staring at me like I'm some batshit crazy loon..._ "

Connor smiled humorously to Hanks sudden embarrassment and attempts at digging himself out of his hole, "I'm sorry Hank, its only because I'm concerned about you, due to your poor diet and antisocial outbursts that I found myself doing it. but if I have merely read too much into what you were saying then I shall return home and let you enjoy the game in peace."

"It wasn't subconscious." he mumbled.

Connor tilted his head narrowing his eyes in confusing. "Then why didn't you just ask?"

 _"Because of my...fuckin' pride I guess."_ he thought but grunted at Connors question.

"You are one of the most bluntest humans I've ever...that is, I've not properly known many humans. but by far you are-"

"Connor." Hank uttered firmly. he then found himself glancing at what Connor had in his hand...and his fashion sense for that matter, he held in his hand a tiny triangle hand flag that read 'go competitive sports', clearly he made himself (With that perfect Cyberlife Sans font). he wore a white T-shirt that said, ' **I'm so bad I vacation in Detroit.'** Hank wondered how old or where he even found it, he held popcorn in his other free hand (again wondering its origin of purchase), lastly a pair of denim shorts and plain black all-stars. Hank mentally scoffed in amusement to himself he would've looked like a natural idiot if it hadn't been for his all too neat and tidy hair.

A smiled formed on his face physically this time as he thought about the effort he had put into this, but also at how he seemed to try too hard as well. but he couldn't find himself to savagely comment on his 'fucked up attire' or even tease him.

"Lieutenant?" Connor said tilting his head.

Hank snapped to attention after his mind wandered, "Huh? I...look just...you can stay a'right?"

Connor walked up to him, "Are you absolutely certain Hank, Its no bother I can-"

"You're fucking staying alright? quit asking for confirmation like an online purchase." he said faking his agitation. Hank looked at his hair again then his eyes looked upwards. Suddenly Connors LED turned a shade of yellow as his vision was suddenly obstructed by Hanks cap, he had roughly shoved it on his head and yanked down on it to the point that the tip of his cap was almost touching Connors nose.

when Connor was finally able to adjust it and fiddled with it to understand what just happened in that moment he looked at Hank who was pretending to act like he hadn't done anything and preferred that nothing be said. Connor thought to question the gesture but thought to drop it, It was merely Hank being Hank and that was enough of an explanation for him.

"I thought I told you to wear your beanie." he uttered quietly, a sound of concern was present also as his mind was suddenly filled with what could have happened...or maybe what **has** happened and Connor just didn't mention it.

"I'm sorry Lieutenant, I must've put too much focus into my attire."

"Just er, give it back after a'right? I've had it for years." he said, again in more a hushed tone than usual. "I'll...have to get you your own." he added clearing his throat. He then reached into his pocket making sure Connor followed his hand, then pulling up a glimpse of two tickets before dropping them back in. a realization panned over Connors face his LED glowing a pale yellow and nodded, Hank looked him dead in the eyes and sighed as confirmation. "Now you know." he started. "I'm not, **used** to having someone around. or asking people if they want to do, whatever...I-I mean I wasn't this bad, sure I was still a little bit of a prick but more like your average asshole that most people could get along with y'know? so I'm told anyway, and now, well...its all gone to shit these past few years."

"Hank I..."

Hank wavered a hand at him, "Don't." he solemnly replied. "Lets just stop it there, all I'll say is that for once in a long time I woke up one day and suddenly gave a shit, I wanted to try but I forgot how, a'right?"

Deciding to drop it, he merely looked to the row of chairs, "Should we sit down then?" Connor said gesturing that the two of them stood out standing in the aisle.

"Right...yeah...uh..." Hank looked for his seat again then turned to Connor, pulling an awkward looking expressing as he tried to figure out how Connor got in without an admission ticket in the first place. They sat down as Connor put his hands on his knees in a tensed up position looking on at the behavior of other humans. Most were tense, few decided that whatever was going on right now wouldn't spoil their lives.

"The seating arrangements are only half full..." he noted. explaining to him how Hank was able to get such cheap tickets in such short notice.

"Yeah...the cities full of fear right now, despite the support of the public in favor of androids, folk aren't entirely comfortable with the lack of whats going on or what happens now." he turned to Connor with a crooked expression. "Don't you **ever** forget to wear that beanie of yours, understand?" he said firmly.

"I won't." Connor replied more preoccupied on the people around them, "At least there are some humans who seem to be taking everyday into there stride." he said pointing at a family of four in front. his particular focus was on a small child whose parental had hoisted them onto their shoulders, Hank noted Connors intent stare. a very curious stare as though he wanted to **experience** this himself and like that time when he was so fixated on chasing deviants across a highway, that time and now made him shudder.

"Hank..."

"You can fuck **right** off!"

"Not even as a social experiment?" Connor stated seriously.

" **Bull** -shit social experiment, I am way too old for that crap, **you** are too old for that crap now just sit **there** and lets watch the game already, got it?" Hank exhaled after that breathless rant and Connor responded by saying nothing at all, but mentally repeating 'got it' and looked out in front of him.

 _"fucking piggy backing, social experiment my ass..."_ Hank rambled to himself.

Connors eyes looked back and forth at the Lieutenant as he tilted his head slightly in his direction, "For your information, I'm Three months and 19 days old."

Hank might as well have snapped his head with how quick he hung his head to the side to look at Connor with a expression similar to whenever he would 'analyze' samples; absolutely disgusted, But not towards Connor, but rather Cyberlife. He thought to say some kind of profanity but he was just so dumbfounded at this point he just waved his hands in a sweeping motion and simply folded his arms and looked on ahead.

"Nothing to leave on Lieutenant, you usually always get in the last word?"

"You want to hear a last word?"

"That is the usual formula."

"Hows this for a last word you're a cu-" he stopped himself willingly as he breathed out a chuckle, "Look...thanks for...Y'know..." he added fondly nudging him with his elbow.

Connor smiled, "I'm sorry I'm afraid I **don't** know." he teased folding his own arms.

"Oh **fuck** you." Hank responded in a typical manner.

* * *

 **A/N Sorry for any mistakes, please forgive me :( So yeah if ya liked it leave a little gentle R+R if ya want, I've got another idea involving Connor going undercover in an illegal underground sex android operation but y'know it probably isn't interesting anyway :P but you know that's just a thought that may or may not work out If i can't get it to make sense but we'll see, have a good one :)**


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